The 143 Best Dirty Pick Up Lines To Try This Year

Are you tired of using the same old cheesy pick up lines that just don’t seem to work anymore? Sick of getting blown off or having your messages left on read? Well, it’s time to step up your game with some dirty pick up lines that are sure to make your crush blush. From subtle innuendos to outright raunchy jokes, these are the best dirty pick up lines that will leave a lasting impression on anyone you’re trying to impress. 

Many funny pick up lines are also quite dirty. Combining sexual innuendo with comedy might seem like a cheap way to get laughs, but it works more often than not. So for those of you who are a little risque when it comes to pick up lines, we have collected some of the dirtiest pick up lines you can try this year. But be warned, these pick up lines aren’t for the faint of heart and should only be used on someone who’s open to a little bit of naughty flirting. The last thing you want to do is offend someone by sending them a naughty pick up line.  

So, whether you’re looking for a one-night stand or a long-term relationship, these are the best dirty pick up lines to try this year. Get ready to turn up the heat and make your move with confidence.

The 143 Best Dirty Pick Up Lines To Try This Year

best dirty pick up lines

  1. Hey girl, is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.
  2. Are you a Slytherin? Because I really want you to slither into my Chamber of Secrets.
  3. Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.
  4. Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention.
  5. I’m not a weatherman, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.
  6. Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in raw.
  7. I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.
  8. Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a large bone for you to examine.
  9. Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
  10. If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by tonight.
  11. Are you a light switch? Because you really turn me on.
  12. I have 206 bones in my body. Want to give me another one?
  13. That shirt’s very becoming on you. If I were on you, I’d be coming too.
  14. Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.
  15. I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
  16. Let’s play carpenter. First, we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.
  17. That sweater looks amazing on you. I bet I would too!
  18. Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.
  19. I can see into the future, and yeah, we’re gonna fuck at least once.
  20. There are plenty of fish in the sea, but you’re the only one I’d like to catch and mount back at my place.
  21. Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis.
  22. I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.
  23. Are you a washing machine? Because I want to put my dirty load in you.
  24. If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
  25. What time do you get off? Can I watch?
  26. I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.
  27. Are you an elevator? Because I want to go up and down on you.
  28. If I were a balloon, would you blow me?
  29. Your place or mine? Tell you what? I’ll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
  30. Is that some Halloween candy in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
  31. Wanna go on an ate with me? I’ll give you the D later.
  32. Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.
  33. Do you run track? Because I heard you Relay want this dick.
  34. Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.
  35. I need a good place to think. Can I sit on your lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up?
  36. Are you a shark? Because I’ve got some swimmers for you to swallow.
  37. I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.
  38. Are you a doctor? Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
  39. Can I give you an Australian kiss? It’s like a French kiss, but Down Under!
  40. Roses are red. Violets are fine. You be the 6. I’ll be the 9.
  41. Do you like whales? Because we can go hump back at my place.
  42. You must be my Tinderella because I’m going to make that dress disappear at midnight.
  43. Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.
  44. I hope you like dragons because I’ll be dragon my balls across your face tonight.
  45. Hi, I’m wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.
  46. Let’s play Winnie the Pooh and get my nose stuck in your honey jar.
  47. Are you my pinky toe? Because I’d like to bang you on all my furniture.
  48. Do you know your ABCs? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.
  49. Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
  50. Are you a cowgirl? Because I can see you riding me.
  51. If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricant.
  52. Were you raised on a farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock!
  53. Are you the lottery lady on TV? Because I’m picturing you holding up my balls.
  54. Fuck me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?
  55. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?
  56. Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
  57. Are you a tortilla? Because I want to flip you over and eat you out.
  58. Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
  59. Are you an eco-friendly kind of girl? The condom in my pocket goes expires tomorrow, so why don’t you help me use it?
  60. I’m a mind reader and yes I will sleep with you.
  61. Call me leaves because you should be blowing me.
  62. I’m a zombie, can I eat you out?
  63. My nickname is dishes, because I want you to get me wet then do me.
  64. Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I’ll owe you one.
  65. Remember my name, because you’ll be screaming it later.
  66. I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.
  67. Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you.
  68. I lost my keys… can I check your pants?
  69. I’d love to kiss your luscious lips…and then the ones on your face.
  70. If you were an elevator, what button would I have to push to get you to go down?
  71. I’m not a weatherman, but I’m expecting a few more inches tonight.
  72. Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass.
  73. Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
  74. Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.
  75. There will only be seven planets left after I destroy Uranus.
  76. Are you hungry? Because omelet you suck this dick.
  77. The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
  78. Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong.
  79. The word of the day is legs. Let’s go back to your place and spread the word.
  80. I’m really good at math, so let’s add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide our legs, and multiply.
  81. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
  82. If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
  83. Do you know what would look good on you? Me.
  84. Sit on my lap and tell me the first thing that pops up.
  85.  Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.
  86. Do you go to church often? Because you’re gonna be on your knees tonight.
  87. Your outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed.
  88. I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?
  89. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
  90. I’m cold, can I use your thighs as earmuffs?
  91. My dick’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
  92. If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed?
  93. My doctor told me I have a vitamin D deficiency. Want to go back to my place and fix that for me?
  94. I don’t think I want your babies yet, but I wouldn’t mind refining my baby-making technique with you.
  95. Wanna play war? I’ll lay on the ground and you blow the fuck outta me.
  96. I may not be a windshield repairman, but I can still fill your crack in.
  97. My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?
  98. That dress looks great on you… as a matter of fact, so would I.
  99. What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don’t have a Ferrari.
  100. Do you have pet insurance? Because your pussy’s getting smashed tonight.
  101. If you’re feeling down, I can feel you up.
  102. Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass.
  103. I’m like a snowflake: beautiful, unique, and with one touch, you’ll feel how wet I am.
  104. My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?
  105. If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
  106. Girl, are you an iceberg? Because you’re making me want to go down.
  107. Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty.
  108. I’ve been trying to conserve more water…wanna shower together?
  109. Can you poke my belly button…from the inside?
  110. My couch pulls out but I don’t.
  111. Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I’ll owe you one.
  112. Is that a keg in your pants? Because I’d love to tap that ass.
  113. Let’s play house. You can be the door then I can slam you all I want.
  114. Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free?
  115. We should play strip poker. You can strip and I’ll poke you.
  116. Let’s play Barbie. I’ll be Ken and you can be the box I come in.
  117. So you’re not into casual sex? Fine, I’ll put on a tux and we can call it formal sex.
  118. I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.
  119. Great dress. I’m sorry I’ll have to rip it apart.
  120. I’m so hungry for chicken, do you have any? No? What about cock?
  121. Do you run track? Because I heard you Relay want this dick.
  122. I’m training to be an astronaut, and my first mission is to explore Uranus.
  123. Are your legs tired? Because as long as I have a face, you’ll have a place to sit.
  124. Do you know why they call me the cat whisperer? Because I know exactly what your pussy needs.
  125. Hi, I’m a burglar… and I’m going to smash your back door in.
  126. Are you butt-dialing me? Because I swear that ass is calling me.
  127. If I was a judge, I’d sentence you to my bed.
  128. Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.
  129. I may not go down in history, but I will go down on you.
  130. Hi, I’m wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.
  131. I wish I was your phone, so you’d be on me all day.
  132. What has four legs and doesn’t have the most beautiful girl on it? My bed. Want to fix that?
  133. Are you a light switch? Because you really turn me on.
  134. I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?
  135. Are you the lottery lady on TV? Because I’m picturing you holding up my balls.
  136. Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
  137. Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
  138. Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
  139. Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I’d love to spread them.
  140.  If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
  141. My dick’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
  142.  I wanna floss with your pubic hair.
  143. Are you a racehorse? Because when I ride you’ll always finish first.